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I have gotten used to letting go of people

Again and again.


They stay inside my heart for awhile

But most of them are passersby.


I know they will leave inevitably

So I always say my goodbyes quietly

even before they make up their minds

even before they pack up and go.


When they’re gone

I try not to search the gaps

and hollow spaces they once occupied

I try not to feel the small indentations

caused by every word

and every touch


But the mind is a masochist–

It goes back again and again.

It keeps probing

Unable to resist asking

the whys

and the what ifs

that will never be answered.


This is the personal blog of teskaraptor aka bananatree. Yes that's me, a 20-something nurse working in the IT field.
If you ask me to choose one word to describe myself, I would choose "weird."

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