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Looking inside a person’s mind

Is like peering into a kaleidoscope

With the thoughts forming patterns

No one else can make sense of,

Not at first.


On closer examination

You’ll see how each shape and each color is infused with meaning.

You’ll see how there is reason behind

Every rotation of the tube and the movement of shapes that follow.


If you’re lucky

You’ll see the true form of the things reflected in those mirrors

And then you will learn to appreciate

The beauty of another being’s existence.

I was dissected within minutes

By all your questions.

You figured me out so easily.

I wonder how you were able to see me so clearly.


I who hate myself and fear everything

With all my walls and locks and secrets

I who cannot define

My dreams, my path, my life, myself.


I didn’t know the right questions to ask

But you did.


Here I sit with you

With my tear-stained cheeks

And the snot running from my nose.


I am horrified and disgusted with myself

But you’re kind enough to tell me

That I am still beautiful.


This is the personal blog of teskaraptor aka bananatree. Yes that's me, a 20-something nurse working in the IT field.
If you ask me to choose one word to describe myself, I would choose "weird."

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